So, in my last post I mentioned the new vocab words that are going to become regulars in my new lifestyle. Boppy (ie?), binky, bottles, poop-It's a whole new world of vocabulary that I have to get used to! There are two other important words that I forgot to mention that I have become friends with since becoming pregnant. Please everyone, let me introduce you to my two new friends SALE and CHEAP.
First of all, I'm not saying that I only shop at Neiman Marcus. In fact, I maybe buy something from there once a year. If I COULD afford it, I would totally be there every living second of the day, rolling around in designer merchandise shouting at the top of my lungs to my personal shopper "That one!" " And that one!" "And THAT one!" Demanding that said personal shopper bring me every single size 7 Louboutin, while feeding me strawberries and popping champagne. "Crack the Dom Pérignon bitches!"
Uh...what? Where was I?
Oh yes-so due to finances I am usually an average/middle of the road kind of retail kind of gal. I regularly frequent Bebe, Athropologie, Steve Madden, Express and BCBG. $150 shoes are a norm in my closet. Nothing too fancy But! Since becoming pregnant-I've started looking elsewhere to buy clothes. Well, kind of. Since I'm buying maternity clothes, obviously I can't go get some kind of size double zero slut skirt from Bebe. I have been going to Pea in the Pod and Gap Maternity which are sort of on the pricey side...Pea in the Pod more than Gap. The big thing is, I've discovered something called "The Sale Rack" OOOOOOO! AHHHHHH! Sale rack! I've discovered you can find cute things on the sale rack, you just kind of have to dig around. I mean, yes I do have two or three maternity shirts that were $60, and I am going to buy at least one good pair of maternity jeans that I LOVE that are $80,but other than that everything has been under $50! I rule! AND I got a really cute maternity dress from....TARGET! I think the only clothes I've ever got from target were my "hiking clothes" I bought for my honeymoon. The dress I got was super cute and comfy, and I am going back for some more maternity stuff this weekend. Who knew?
Also, shoes have been an issue. As a pregnant woman, the pairs and pairs of four inch heels covering my closet floor were just not going to do. I thought some flat boots would be good to wear with leggings while preggers. But, as we are socking money away, I did not think it was a good idea to spend $200 per pair of boots. I needed a black pair and a brown pair and a grey pair...because the wrong color boot can make your outfit look so dumb. (really really dumb). So one evening, while strolling around the Plymouth Meeting Mall, I walk by Wet Seal.
Do I dare? Do I dare go into Wet Seal? It was my FAVORITE store in High School ( formerly called Contempo Casuals for those of you who are not old dinosaurs). I peeked in. The music was stupid and loud, it was the first time I heard that G6 song, and I still don't know what the hell at G6 is but anyway. Yes, everyone in there looked like Snookie or some low rent version of Lady Gaga. Me and my pregnant self quickly run back to the "shoe" section. It's like, all of the shoes are sitting on a rack tied together by a plastic thingy. SOOOO cheap looking. Anway-little brown boots on sale for $25 (from $40) Cool! Sweet! Let me get these and get the F out of here! I go to the register, and I am greeted by Bubbles McGee. "DID YOU FIND EVERYTHING YOU WERE LOOKING FOR?" She screams at me over the stupid G6 song. "Yes, thank you" I say. "THE BOOTS ARE BUY ONE, GET ONE FOR A PENNY!" Um, what?? A penny? "YES, A PENNY!" Okaaaay. I go back over to the "boots" and see one pair of black tall flat boots. Alrighty then. Penny boots. I go back over to the register where I see Bai Ling's twin holding my brown boots. She then takes my black boots out of my hand. "These are sooo gorgeous" she says seriously. Um..wtf lady. These are not gorgeous shoes. They are efficient, black, cost one cent, and will do the job during my pregnancy. I was sooo embarrassed to even be in there with these people. I paid my bill of $25.01 plus tax and ran out like a G6.
Good Mommy! Buying ugly sale shoes so your daughter can have a Neiman Marucs baby blanket.
hahah. "so dumb. Really Really dumb" hahahah.
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